Thursday, March 19, 2009

Real Love

There are times when I am critical of my husband. There, I said it. Just call me Missrude. Unfortunately I am not critical in a nice, loving, constructive way, but in a way that offends and discourages him. And if I am honest with myself, I probably do it way more often than I realize because, sadly, I don't even recognize my critical attitude most of the time. It just shows up, ugly, mean, and downright vicious sometimes.

Just a couple of days ago Missrude showed up yet again when my husband was putting his shoes on and was getting dirt on our hardwood front room floor. Of course, I made a comment that sounded something like "Nice" and immediately felt bad when I noticed that it offended him. It should be noted that one of the reasons he was putting on his shoes was to go to the store to pick up some cereal that I asked him to get for Andy. It turns out Andy loves the new Jumbo Rice Krispies. It's a great finger-food snack for little ones.

Anyway, I digress.

In my defense, I was partially kidding but I did want to bring the dirt to his attention. I was
annoyed because I knew that I would be cleaning it up if I didn't say anything. I know he didn't do it on purpose but I'm not sure that he realized what he was doing. It really isn't a big deal but I tend to get critical when someone does something different than I would. Apparently, I have the most common sense so everyone should just do things my way.

Well, we exchanged words and one of us could have said something along the lines of "I don't know how I am going to survive the next fifty years of this marriage." Of course we will survive however long God gives us with each other because we made a commitment to God and to each other to not only survive but thrive in our marriage.

When Chris came home from the gym and the store with a bag full of stuff, I asked him what he got. He calmly announced that he bought some flowers. Knowing that he was upset with me when he left, I asked him why he got flowers. If I remember right, he said he got them because he was mad at me but he loves me still. I need to mention that these flowers are my most favorite flower and he picked a shade close to one of my favorite colors.

Chris demonstrated what real love is all about: Choosing to love and showing that love even when we may feel like harboring a grudge instead.

Thank you, Chris, for choosing to love me even when I am unlovable. Thank you for showing what it means to love. Those precious boys have an important example of a husband who chooses to love his wife.

And hopefully Missrude will take a long walk off a short pier. Gosh, I don't think anyone says that anymore but it was very popular when I was a teenager. Ugh, I'm dating myself so I think I'll stop now.

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